About Freaking Time

I’m even getting tired of me using my cancer/ankle as excuses for not keeping up with my blog and writing, I can’t imagine how much you must want to vomit when reading this blog….

HEY!  It could be a new diet trend! ‘ Read Laura’s blog, lose 4lbs a week!  Frequent visitors keep the weight off!  Comments burn an extra 100 calories!’

Act now while Laura’s misery supply lasts!!

In all seriousness it is about freaking time that I got back to the business of being me.  Writing, mothering, not whining all the time; but it’s so hard (ok, whining a *little* is ok).  I got back home from a week long visit to the back end of Texas visiting my grandma who is about to get to see the other side of the curtain.  She’s such an inspiration, everything that she has marched through and held her head high, I can do no less.  So today, instead of sleeping in, I went to the store, stocked up, put Christmas on layaway so I wouldn’t have an excuse to stop writing to go shopping, and worked out for the first time in… umm, no comment.

I’m getting back in the saddle again after a little more than 2 months of almost complete inactivity.  It’s going to hurt… a lot.

Thankfully, my mother in Texas kept the mess maker ( Child Number 3) until she comes up to visit, which should be in 3 weeks to a month, so for the first time since his birth I am going to be able to focus on something for longer than the span between commercial breaks.  *SQUEE!*

It makes me want to nap, forever, and then read a little, eat a cookie, and nap some more.  Except I promised myself I wouldn’t do that.

Must.Not.Take.Nap.

Wow, that is sooooo much harder than it seems.  I was built for napping.  Napping is in my blood. Well, actually high concentrations of creatinine are in my blood, and that’s why I need the dialysis, but that’s neither here nor there.  Cookie, anyone?

Ok… so, to sum it up.

1)  Read my Blog.  It helps you lose weight!

2)  I’m not going to nap, I’m going to write, dammit!

3)  Man, I’m sleepy…. *yawn*

 

 

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The Truth in Titles

At least my title anyway.

I don’t know how many people actually look at the titles that others place under their names on forums, or on their profie pages. Anal-retentive such and such that I am I spent long hours internet eons ago thinking of the perfect tiny title that would describe the soul sucking microcosm that is me. (Hey, I should have gone with Soul Sucking Microcosm!)

I ended up with Author, Mother, Gimp.
This was before all of the attack-display fiasco which has landed me in surgery and stuck on the downstairs couch for almost a month now. I am losing my collective minds.

I finally made it upstairs today for the first time in, well, forever it seems.

I haven’t written a word, editied a chapter, posted a blog, or had a decent bath since my surgery in August. I am so tired of this, but being sick and injured takes a lot out of you!

My immune system is still defunct from the chemo, and the surgery was hard. Add to that I caught an infection in the wound, and you have all the makings of a PAR-TAY! *not*

I’m hoping to get back into the groove this coming week since I can now hobble a bit and scoot up and down the stairs on my butt. Maybe even, dare I say it, WRITE!

*Angles sing HALLELUJAH!*

If not, I am going to have to change my title to just Gimp.

Hairy Mustache Women

Mr Laura and I took the kids (and friend) to the fair last night, and I have to say that the women there truly inspired me…..

To wax my mustache.

 

Seriously, I have never seen that much feminine upper lip hair in one congregation since…well…ever.   This wasn’t even part of the side show, either!

However, wandering around and eating fried oreos (yum!) whilst looking at the veritable smorgasboard of humanity drawn to the flashing lights and promise of a thrill for only 3 tickets; I began to see the people there, however hairy as more than just people.  I saw them as characters.  Characters that gave depth and quirk to an already colorful story.

Writing is that way sometimes too.  We start out with a single character or place, and then a story, and then a subplot, etc.  However, sometimes the best stories are the ones that include not only the good looking prince and the ever-suffering princess, but the ones that also tell the stories of the freaks and geeks who also dwell in the kingdom.

So let’s face it, we need the bearded lady too.  And Pinhead Larry, and the Elephant Man.  Those are the people who create a background for your more traditional characters to play against, or along with.

I forget that sometimes, that not only do my main characters need as much attention as I can give them, but their hairy mustachioed lady friends’ need attention too.

And possibly some depilatory cream.

 

 

I Got the Word Count Blues…

*plays sad song on trumpet*

I don’t know about everyone else, but it seems like the last week has been an uphill struggle to stay on track.

I have spent an inordinate amount of time reading other blogs, looking at inspirational cat posters, and reading helpful tips from other writers this week in an effort to get myself back into the 1-2k a day range.  Is there something in the air?

Healthwise, I’m doing good, except for a low grade fever that won’t bugger off.  Leg wise, also ok and looking forward to the surgery next week.  Mentally, I am shot.  This has all been such an emotional roller coaster that I really, really want to get off of and just write.

My favorite blog post find of the week was this gem:
http://cjredwine.blogspot.com/2011/08/youre-kind-of-big-deal.html

I’m a sucker for dressed up cats.

Send me comments on what you do to get through the times where the words only flow in increments of 100 rather than 1000.

Please?  Pretty please with sugar on top?

Know what’s funny?

When kid’s prank call your house and ask if your refrigerator is running.

And you say no.  😦

 

So along with the cancer, the torn up ankle and knee, the mounting medical bills, the irate children, and mutinous husband I now have about $1000 in spoiled food and a busted fridge.  Sears can’t come out to service it until next Tuesday ( which is like FOREVER in broken fridge days).  I should probably write a story where cannibal repairmen come and rip the one that is making me wait limb from limb and then eat him.  Yep.  Sounds good.

I am trying so hard to stay on schedule with my writing.  I got distracted by my short story this week, I ended up polishing it and submitting it for an anthology.  We’ll see. 😀

I decided that my first chapter needed an addition to it to make something else later on make more sense.  My first chapter is now 12 pages single spaced.  Gah.  Methinks I overshot.

I have this really detailed not in actual writing plan on how I am going to have this thing finished by the end of September and polished by the end of October so that I can go to the Backspace Author Seminar and be able to hob knob with agents and get a book deal and be ridiculously famous and buy hundreds of working refrigerators and comfy socks and live happily ever after… *breathe, Laura, breathe* I just have to keep on this path.  The hardest thing is just to keep going sometimes when every problem in life seems so big.  To remember there is Someone looking out for you.  I need to do that more often.

I also joined a site called Ladies Who Critique, so that I could find a crit or writing partner.  Despite everyone that has joined, I don’t think there is actually a matching program to do that.  I kind of expected something like eharmony  for writers, where they match you with a compatible person to help you along.  I am reserving judgement since it is in beta, but I will say that the group of women who have also joined in its first days are lovely and funny and pretty dang awesome.   I hope to be lucky enough to be asked to partner with one of them if we ever figure out how that happens.

And the dog just tooted under my chair.  Great.  Good thing I was done here anyway.

Kids Taste Like Chicken or Short Story Frustration

First thanks to all the twitterpates, blog sweeties, and absolute writers who have sent me well wishes the last week.  It really does make my day when you remind me that people care.  It’s hard going through this without family to help, and your kindness means the world.

*wipes tear*

Okay, so enough of the mushy stuff.

The last few days, other than painful in an ouch-my-side-has-a-huge-hole-in-it sort of way have also been painful in a writery way.

I finished up my extended outline/rough draft/bunch of scenes thing last week and was totally enthused to get started on a polished first draft this week.  Like a kid at Christmas excited.

And then my three small children, like a host of locusts, came in a ate all of my enthusiasm away.

They can’t help it.  My husband leaves for work, they wake up, Mommy is exhausted from recovering from chemo or whatever and I sleep in a bit.  They make cereal and watch cartoons until I get up and about.  They seem to stay pretty docile as I wander around getting coherent, but it seems like the second I go upstairs and sit down to write, they turn into whirling dervish hats and crawl on top of my head.

One wants to play computer games on the other desk here, one wants to ridicule the first, and the third is dropping foodstuff and terrorizing the dog while asking if they can look at petpetpark or something.  So I get up and get pay attention to them even though all I want is to sit and write and not wheeze when I walk.  Everything returns to calm.  Then I sit back down and suddenly I am in the middle of a lightsabre fight and someone wants to be helf and someone broke a picture with a ball and suddenly … I find myself writing a short story where a race of aliens traps and eats a families children.

I know, I’m horrible.  In my defense, it made me feel better, and it came out pretty good, too.

I don’t usually write short stories, but I just needed to vent and write, and this worked.  I’m going to submit it to an anthology contest and see what happens, I’m just waiting to find a beta reader.  Whatever works, right?

And btw, if you DO know if kids taste like chicken, I don’t want to know. 😀

Biopsies and Book Art

I will spare you the ugly bloody band aid picture, but today I went and had what I hope is to be my last stomach biopsy.

I have been responding well to the chemo, my blood numbers are normal, if anemic, my kidney is hanging in there, and if things are close to where my doctor guesses, I may be in an acceptable remission!  Woot!

Pray for me guys, pray for me.

Since the hubby couldn’t take more time off work, and we have no family in a 12 hour driving distance, and also no sitter, I ended up calling a neighbor to keep a look out for the house being on fire and left the oldest child to watch the boys while I went to have my needle biopsy. Scary, yes.  However, she helps me with them all the time, and watches other people’s kids to boot.

I left her with a phone, and took off.  The drive was 4 minutes.  The oncologists office was prepped and ready for me, as soon as I walked in the door, I was led straight back, helped to strip, and slathered in ultrasound gel.  This all took less than 5 minutes.  Within another 10, the doctor walks in, and as we discussed, performs a no anesthetic needle biopsy of my stomach and omentum.  Ow, ow, ow.  Everything is out, I am dressed and pukeing in a trash can in another 10, and after a quick bandage up and a promise that I will call when I get home, I am back out the door and another 5 minute drive home.

So 40 minutes round trip for what ends up being an all day event for most people.  That, my friends, is how we get *bleep* DONE. 😀

……………….

On a whole other front, I am obsessed the last week or two with trying to sketch a fairly pivotal piece of jewelry from TOME (my current WIP).

I even tried to hire someone from craigslist to sketch it out for me, but everyone was either skeezy or wanted like $150.  Ummm, no.  I just want to see what it looks like from someone who can draw more than a frog-rabbit ( which is what all my animals look like).  And then I want to find someone on Etsy who does wire jewelry to make me a piece that looks like the sketch.

I started looking at other people’s book art to see what kind of work they had, and now have almost 30 windows open of various pieces I like in a vainglorious attempt at pretending that I will one day be in the position to demand book art to my standards.  *sigh*

 

Once I get done pukeing and rolling around in pain, I’m going to get back to work polishing and fixing my ms.  Then I will daydream some more.  Also probably eat a cookie, because I deserve it.